The Return of the Living Dead (1985)
Director Dan O’Bannon
Stars Thom Mathews, James Karen, Clu Gulager, Don Calfa, Linnea Quigley
Things You Might Like
- Hilarious zombie action
- Interesting take on a well-established premise
- Tarman!
- Linnea Quigley is naked almost the entire film
- Bad on purpose
Things You Might Not Like
- These ain’t Romero’s zombies
- Nefarious acting and music
- Bad on purpose
Conclusion
If you’re into hokey popcorn flicks and haven’t seen this yet, you’re in for a real treat.
4 out of 5 BRAINS
Jonathan David Lim
***
Zombie films have come a long way. Like the monsters of other horror sub-genres, the walking dead have undergone their fair share of changes through reworkings and reimaginings, the most famous of which is the seminal work Night of the Living Dead. Breaking almost thirty years of film tradition that saw zombies as the victims of voodoo witchcraft – the first example of which can be seen in 1939′s The White Zombie starring Bela Lugosi — George A. Romero raised the bar and re-introduced the zombie to a new generation of filmgoers that has persisted to this day.
So of course it should be no surprise that seventeen years after Night terrified audiences, the zombie film would get another go. Based on a script by Night co-writer John Russo as a planned sequel — which in turn was based on his novel of the same name — director Dan O’Bannon sauntered in, cheesed it up, made it loud, and flaunted The Return of the Living Dead in the faces of everybody who took horror way too seriously.
Primarily a horror-comedy, Return is one hell of a popcorn flick. It has everything: from ’80s punks to life-sized puppets; from barking half-dogs to atom bombs. There is very little not to like about Return, unless you’re offended by absolutely everything, in which case you probably don’t see very many films to begin with.
The film opens in a medical supplies warehouse, where we follow Freddy (Thom Mathews) on the first day at his new job with his boss, Frank (James Karen, in one ultra-campy performance that is almost impossible not to laugh at), showing him the ropes. Like most boring jobs, this one comes with a dark and potentially sinister secret — in the basement of the warehouse are five mysterious canisters that should belong to the government. The only remains of the ‘actual’ night of the living dead (the basis for the 1968 film), the canisters contain the frozen corpses of the undead, and an experimental gas called 245-Trioxin. As can be expected, it’s not long before our idiot heroes manage to pop one of canisters open and bring about the zombie apocalypse.
What follows is a veritable mosh pit of a film – Freddy’s friends all show up to hang out, but as he’s still at work, decide to wait in the nearby graveyard (aptly called Resurrection Cemetery); warehouse manager Burt (Clu Gulager) is called in to help sort out the zombie situation; and local coroner Ernie (Don Calfa in one hell of a great role) is asked to ‘deal’ with the body. But as the zombies in Return are reproduced not from bites, but the airborne Trioxin, we soon see an entire graveyardful of ghouls erupt from their resting places in pursuit of one thing: BRAINS!
In a massive departure from Romero’s zombies, O’Bannon’s actively run about, open doors, leap through windows, and speak into radios to ‘Send more paramedics.’ This works in the film’s favour; in one bizarre sequence, O’Bannon asks us to sympathise with the zombies during a conversation with a half-woman on an autopsy table. For the first time we get to see the world on the creatures’ side of things, a full two decades before Romero attempts something of the same with Land of the Dead.
Of course, it isn’t perfect. This film boasts some of the worst acting on record, which if you’re not ready or in the mood for, can be a bit much. It’s obvious the purpose of the performances are to be little more than exaggerated reactions, but watching everybody stand about with clenched fists, buggy eyes, and raspy voices can be tiring.
Much of the same can be said about the soundtrack, which balances somewhere between perfect and downright awful.
But then, it’s bad on purpose. Being a popcorn flick, it’s the idiot twin to the exploitation/grindhouse film; while the former is going for fun, the latter usually goes for broke. Sure Return has its fair share of blood, guts, and tits (Linnea Quigley spends only about two minutes of her role as Trash clothed; for the remainder, she’s completely buck-ass naked), but unlike the other horror films of 1985, these are played for comedic effect, rather than spooky. Hell, the infamous Tarman — the original zombie as seen in the canister — is a gigantic puppet. And really, who’s afraid of puppets?
The Return of the Living Dead is great fun. If you can handle the nefarious acting and music, it’s more than worth a watch. Be sure to check it out in time before The Complete History of the Return of the Living Dead, a book full to the brim with extras and behind-the-scenes stuff, is due out in October of this year. (Here’s to more Linnea Quigley, am I right lads?)
**Oh yes, and one final note: whether this is the first or twenty-first time you’ve seen Return, watch it with the knowledge that the character of Ernie was written as a Nazi veteran hiding out in Louisville, Kentucky. Who says popcorn flicks can’t have hidden meaning?
Buy The Return of the Living Dead from Amazon now
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