The Muppets (2011)

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There will be Muppets.

Director James Bobin

Stars Amy Adams, Jason Segel, Chris Cooper, and Steve Whitmire

Things You Might Like

• Muppets
• Collecting Muppets via the power of montage
• Map Travel
• Gonzo’s profession

Things You Might Not Like

• Chris Cooper’s song
• The Mary & Gary romance
• The distinct lack of a song by Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem

Conclusion
The Muppets is a fitting follow up to the classics–and though it could be chopped down a bit, there’s nothing to keep you from enjoying the fun.

4 out of 5 Used Executive Toilets

Aaron Simon

***

Okay!

So, apologies for not bringing you a review of Stephen King’s new novel, but that thing’s a beast. FACT: I killed a griffin with it just last night.

Anyway. It might not surprise you to learn that I’m a fan of the Muppets. The Muppet Movie was one of the four movies on constant repeat whenever I was at home and conscious until—roughly—the age of nine. I consider Gonzo’s line about Bombay, India one of the crowning achievements of film.

So, when I had the time to go see The Muppets last week, you’re damn right I jumped on it. It may have been me and my Dad in the theater that was otherwise filled with toddlers and super young children, but damn it, we were there to watch the freaking Muppets, and we were going to enjoy it.

(Side note: it feels really weird putting swears in a review of The Muppets. I apologize.)

The movie begins with Walter (voiced by Peter Linz), a Muppet brother of Gary (Jason Segel), talking over a montage of how weird it was growing up a Muppet in human society—until, that is, he discovers The Muppet Show. The program shows him that he’s not as much of a freak as he thinks he is, and that there is a place for him somewhere out in the world.

Fast forward twenty (ish) years later. Walter and Gary live together in a small house in Smalltown, USA—in what appears to be Kansas, God help them. While Gary is a typical Smalltownian, in the middle of a ten-year relationship with Mary (Amy Adams), Walter still wants to visit the Muppets.

So, when the two humans decide to go to L.A. to celebrate their ten year anniversary, they bring Walter along for the ride so he can finally visit Muppet Studios. Upon arrival, they find that the studios are in total disrepair and a disgruntled Alan Arkin is the only person working there as an apathetic tour guide.

After Walter sneaks into Kermit’s office, he overhears the plans of a wealthy oil tycoon, Tex Richman (Chris Cooper), to drill for oil under the studios unless the Muppets can raise ten million dollars to buy back the deed before it expires.

And that is when the plot begins and Walter makes it his mission to have the Muppets reunite and put on a show to buy back the Studios.

So, right, one of the most important things in any Muppet movie are the songs—and in The Muppets, we’re given some new, some old, and some that shouldn’t have been done. (Specifically: The Muppets backing bloody “We Built This City,” which is one of my most hated songs ever conceived of by humanity.) But, for nostalgic reasons alone, The Muppets scores big numbers just by cleverly including this:

The sad thing is that there is no Electric Mayhem number. There should have been. By God, there needed to be in this dark world in which we live, but there wasn’t. The earth doesn’t exactly open up and release hell’s minions because of the lack of a new song belted by Dr. Teeth, but it does come close.

Next up comes comedy. This was one of my concerns, because Fozzie is a family idol, and if he hadn’t been pitch-perfect, then the movie would have been ruined for me. Luckily, Fozzie, Gonzo, and the other purely comedic figures live up to the Henson-era madness that we all know and love.

Aside from that, good situational jokes, puns, and the cameos in the movie are very well placed. (Zach Galifianakis as “Hobo Joe” for example.)

But—but—the problem is with Adams and Segel. Their acting is fine, the characters, taken on their own, are fine. The catch, in the reviewer’s jaded eyes, is that their relationship—which forms the B story of the movie—takes up a whole lot of time and slows down the film when we’d rather be watching the Muppets be all kooky and whatnot.

See, I understand the reason why this is an Important Plot Point. They’re the catalyst that brought Walter to Muppet Studios and started everything moving right along—

–but, man, does it throw the otherwise great A story to a halt at points. The love story we want to see is Kermit and Piggy, man, that’s what we want. But, eh, it is the B story, after all.

So, over all, it’s great entertainment for a couple of hours. The detraction of Mary and Gary’s relationship isn’t too grating, but it’ll make you impatient. But, hey man, it’s the Muppets, relax.

See In Theaters, Rent, or Pirate? See In Theaters! …And then buy the film from Amazon when it comes out! (NOTE: Bullet Reviews does not condone piracy. What are you, a muppet?)